:)

The glittering sheen of the ballroom was making me feel sick. The smell of sickly-sweet treats burnt my nostrils and I fought the need to sneeze. Perspiration collected on my top lip. I was terrified that the swollen salty drop would roll down, down, down the curve of my lips and drip down onto my chin. My immobilising dress grew around me like a taffeta flower, its prickly thorns shooting bolts of pain up my stockinged legs. The boastful throaty jests of the men and the women’s trilling gave the impression of birds trapped in a golden cage. My dried mouth felt sour and thick in the stifling heat. The scene sprawled below me, spilling out in a wave from the tall room into the dark garden. It was only a thin layer of the balustrade wood that held me from the storey below.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

I don't really know where I'm going with that story haha.

Here's something to think about:
I think a truly happy person is one who can see beauty in everything.




I don't even remember who took that photo, argh, I suck haha.

On the plus side, I've just decided to not worry about things. I feel so much happier like straight away. It's wonderful.

xoxo,
Megan

Guitar Hero Plays this Year: 36
Mental Slaps Today: 4

WOOHOO!

BEDHAM is overrrr! This was way harder than I expected, especially the past fifteen days without the hype that surrounds BEDA. But I did it(sort of)!

I am going to my mother daughter dinner and getting my hair cut tomorrow. That's exciting for me because I am going to finally have nicer hair! Yippee yah yah!

I can honestly say that with all of the crap that has been going on in my life right now, this is a super good time for this to be over. I will be able to not have as much stress in my life!!

I think I'm being a bit harsh on the old BEDHAM, I have enjoyed doing it. Especially due to my BEDA buddies, whom I heartily thank.

I will probably be blogging fairly sporadically from now on. Hey, saying sporadically has just made me think of Clueless which I watched the other day. I'll admit, I'm a tiny bit like Cher (but less rich haha). I am also completely in love with Paul Rudd. He's super sexy.

I have enjoyed blogging every day, it's been good practice for writing every day. I hope that wherever/whoever you are you're having a great time :)

xoxo,
Megan

Kg's to Goal: 5
Guitar Hero Plays this Year: 36
Mental Slaps Today: 3

David Bowie and Queen

Mm ba ba de
Um bum ba de
Um bu bu bum da de
Pressure pushing down on me
Pressing down on you no man ask for
Under pressure - that burns a building down
Splits a family in two
Puts people on streets
Um ba ba be
Um ba ba be
De day da
Ee day da - that's o.k.
It's the terror of knowing
What this world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming 'Let me out'
Pray tomorrow - gets me higher
Pressure on people - people on streets
Day day de mm hm
Da da da ba ba
O.k.
Chippin' around - kick my brains around the floor
These are the days it never rains but it pours
Ee do ba be
Ee da ba ba ba
Um bo bo
Be lap
People on streets - ee da de da de
People on streets - ee da de da de da de da
It's the terror of knowing
What this world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming 'Let me out'
Pray tomorrow - gets me higher high high
Pressure on people - people on streets
Turned away from it all like a blind man
Sat on a fence but it don't work
Keep coming up with love
but it's so slashed and torn
Why - why - why ?
Love love love love love
Insanity laughs under pressure we're cracking
Can't we give ourselves one more chance
Why can't we give love that one more chance
Why can't we give love give love give love give love
give love give love give love give love give love
'Cause love's such an old fashioned word
And love dares you to care for
The people on the edge of the night
And love dares you to change our way of
Caring about ourselves
This is our last dance
This is ourselves
Under pressure
Under pressure
Pressure

()()()()()

Eff my life.

No time

I don't really have much time at all to type this. Like, fifteen minutes.

I am, actually, finishing a Hamlet assignment as we speak. It's a bit more difficult than I thought it would be but it is still proving manageable, so that's good.

I had a big talk with the friend who has depression, that made things a little better I think.

It was my unofficial school birthday today, I had cake in P.C. and was allowed to pay out my P.C. teacher with no pay out payback, I pay him out all the time anyway.

I'm so tired right now. I can kind of sleep really well and anywhere but recently I've been waking up with the impression that I've been having a nightmare even though I can't remember what it was about. It's really weird.

xoxo,
Megan

Kg's to Goal: Unknown
Guitar Hero Plays This Year: 37
Mental Slaps Today: 52

Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day in Australia. I'm not entirely sure when it is everywhere else. I gave my mummy an ABBA cd. She enjoyed it lol. She made us listen to it on repeat as we were going to and from brunch.

I know I didn't post for like the past two days. I'm sorry! I've been sooo busy though. I couldn't post for all of Friday because it was my birthday and like straight after school my friends came over for a sleepover. It was so fun though! I got a really good swag of presents, if I do say so myself. I got a laptop, a 120 gig iPod (I named it Alexander), like ten dvds, a new dressing gown, a large amount of gift certificates from my friends, a cute toy robot, some awesome silver ribbed tights, two necklaces, the Skins season 1 soundtrack and some other stuff. I am quite pleased. I haven't actually tried out my new laptop yet haha, I'm really slack.

I got a bit sad on my birthday though. I was kind of hyper-emotional. I nearly cried because my cheesecake had wildberry sauce on it and I'd forgotten that one of my friends (the ex-best friend) was allergic to raspberries. She ate it and it was fine though, thank God. We played truth or dare and that was fun, it would have been more fun if we had boys there though. We also played 'I Never' which yielded some interesting revelations from the people in the group. We also watched 'Wild Child' and collectively swooned over Alex Pettyfer (?? I don't actually know if that's his name and I am way too lazy to look it up).

I was a bit...insecure on my birthday. I sort of...like, there's a lot of stuff going on in my life right now. One of my friends who has depression is sort of relapsing and a new girl has joined my group (that by itself isn't really anything, it's just because I sort of feel uncomfortable and we have to re-adjust the group dynamics around her) and stuff is just going on. I sort of want like...someone to rely on or someone I can trust to talk to but I don't really have that. As I don't have a best friend in my group, I don't have that there and the person who I used to talk to is the one who is battling depression. So, I'm sort of more focused on being there for them. I feel like I can't complain or talk to that person anymore, because obviously their problems are worse than mine. I dunno...I can't really confide in anyone, which is weird for someone like me who is used to telling everyone everything. I guess there's nothing I can do about it though.

I kind of want a boyfriend...it's nice to have that bond with someone, you know? I think that just having a really good friend would be enough though.

I don't really have anything else to say.

xoxo,
Megan

Kg's to Goal: x
Guitar Hero Plays This Year: 36
Mental Slaps Today: 13

Yippee Yah Yah

It's my birthday tomorrow! I'll never be sixteen again *tear*.

Some exciting things that happened while I was sixteen:

1. Semi-formal (like a junior prom??)

2. Guitar Hero...'nuff said

3. Thinking I was truly beautiful for the first time

4. First time being drunk!!

5. End of year eleven

6. Beginning of year twelve

7. Duxed english in my grade

8. Starred in a friend's film that got shown at a film awards ceremony

9. Volunteering at a local charity.

10. Formal!!

Speaking of, here is a picture of my date and I:

I am sixteen, going on seventeen!

Um...laters!

xoxo,

Megan

Kg's to Goal: 5

Guitar Hero Plays This Year: 35

Mental Slaps Today: 14

Dandelion Seed

I was considering just skipping this day but because I actually remembered about doing my blog post, I think I should write something. I don't have anything to say, so here's a poem!

Dandelion Seed

Find me,
Catch me floating,
Find me,
Look, look at your prize,

Speak to me,
Tell me everything,
Speak to me,
Whisper me your dreams,

Blow me away,
Purse your lips,
Blow me away,
Dance with me freely,

Push me,
Break me apart,
Push me,
See me scattered always,

Let me go,
Watch me soar,
Let me go,
Fly away from you.

Yep.

xoxo,
Megan

Kg's to Goal: 6 (shdions)
Guitar Hero Plays This Year: 34
Mental Slaps Today: 6

I'm a bad person!

It was the friend who I am having problems with's birthday today but I made a card for someone else who's birthday it is :$ I am going to buy Problem Friend a birthday present though, so I think that makes it somewhat better??

I also don't particularly want to call my father even though he left me a sweet message asking me what I'd like for my birthday. I hate talking to people on the phone, I never have anything to talk about with him, it will be super awkward and I don't really feel much of a connection to him since he moved away. Shrug. I guess I'll have to, even though it's probably a bit late now.

I'm having a whole bagful of emotional issues and stresses, I am contemplating throwing myself off a ferris wheel -_- Just kidding, but you know...ARGH!

I'm going to go.

xoxo,
Megan

Kg's to Goal: Unknown
Guitar Hero Plays this Year: 34
Mental Slaps Today: 34

Insert Creative Title Here

Notimenotimenotime!!!

So, today I helped my Mum by moving a MASSIVE pile of branches and offcuts into a skip. I thought I was going to die because my iPod is broken (fingers crossed for a new one on my birthday), R.I.P. George. I listen to my iPod allllll the time so it's been hard for these past few weeks where I haven't had one. Anyway, I thought that the mindlessness of moving branches etc. was going to numb me into nothingness but I survived it by pretending it was a challenge on the Amazing Race. It was quite fun after that :P

I still have to finish my MHI assignment (I haven't even started editing it yet!!!). It was so annoying in class though, because my teacher always tries to make us change our hypothesis based on what she thinks. It isn't meant to be like that, you're supposed to be graded on how well you present evidence to support your hypothesis, not how well your view lines up with hers. Last time I did actually change my hypothesis, however, this time I have decided not to. That means that I have to do double the research to anyone else though to convince her that I know what I'm talking about.

I still can't really talk about the formal because I'm still pictureless, but here are some statistics for you about the night.

Friends in Party: 15
Friends in Limo 1: 10
Friends in My Limo: 5
Courses in Meal: 3
Deliciousness of Food: 0.5 Pizzas
Songs Danced To: 42
Songs Sat Out (Including Dinner): 31
Total Girls Drunk: 32%
Total Boys Drunk: 40%
Pictures Taken: 0 (my camera broke!)
Times Proposed To: 1 (I was Juliet when Love Story by Taylor Swift came on because I had a white dress, hence, I got proposed to :P)
Number of Drinks of Coke Spilt On My Dress: 1
Fun Had: 10000000000 Gigawatts

xoxo
Megan

Kg's to Goal: 5
Guitar Hero Plays This Year: 34
Mental Slaps Today: 3

Urban Dictionary Meme

I might talk about the formal more when I have pictures, but it was so awesome :)

Anyway, for this meme, what you do is search your name in Urban Dictionary and show your fave definitons :). It was invented by JohnnyDurham19 on Youtube. Here we go!

Megan (n): A mean, catty girl. This girl does not have to be named Megan for it is a nickname or insult describing a girl who likes to steal boyfriends, crushes and 99% of all straight guys in the area. Perfect looking, tons of friends, and everyone loves (but secretly hates) her.
Example
Girl 1: Oh MY GOD. Cindy was so awful on the ski trip. She was flirting with Ryan and James! Girl 2: Wow. Shes being a total Megan.
[Not true :P]

Megan (n): Some slob that thinks she is the shit, when really she looks like shit. They think they know everything, but again they know nothing. They sound like retards when they talk, they are VERY annoying. Only thinks about themselves, not very good parents, likes to start shit but never finishes it. Sometimes megans look like a man.
Example
"Who is that on the pole out there?"
"Who else would it be but Megan?"
[Also untrue haha]

Megan (n): A girl who is not afriad to say whats on her mind. She is musically involved, smart, funny, and is beutiful. She can be a heart-breaker, so watch out! She does not believe in animal cruelty and usually is a vegetarian. Because of her abillity to give great advice, she is everyone's friend and everyone loves her.
Example
Just ask Megan, she'll know what to do.
[This one's true :P]

Megan (v): An action taken which results in complete failure.
Example
I tried to catch that frisbee but I totally pulled a Megan and messed it up.
[Lol.]

Megan (n): The coolest girl you'll ever meet. Amazing, beautiful and flawless. She can kick your ass in just about everything, but she will only prove this if you really bug her. Megans are usually pretty smart and street-wise and they know what they're talking about (most of the time).
Example
"Oh my god man, how did you get that pool cue stuck up there?!"
"I told Megan she was wrong, and that I was better than her at pool.."
"Oh right... You don't know her well at all, do you...?"
[True :P :P]

Megan (n): A tall and lean brunette who always is the weirdest out of the group who listens to the music nobody has ever heard of but then it comes in style. Makes drastic desicions... can make everyone laugh in an awkward situation. Is very music involved and is smart beyond belief. Likes guys but is too afraid to talk to them and puts her friends before herself.
Example
I has no example. Rawr.
[This one is like...scarily accurate :P]

Megan (n): A girl that is very stubborn but at the same time can be the greatest friend on the planet. She loves pizza and is absolutley gorgeous. She is loved by everybody and is fucking hilarious!
Example
Neither do I :(
[This one is also quite true.]

Megan (n): A person who only eats meat.
Example
Person 1: "Hey I'm Vegan!"
Person 2: "Hey I'm Megan!"
[It's funny because I'm vegetarian :P]

Megan (n): Megans are usually very good at keeping secrets but usually tend to speak their mind. They keep too much themselves and have many secrets to their past. Easily annoyed and open minded. Is very daring and hardly ever afraid of anyone or anything. Very bold. Opinionated. Good to animals. Can be self concious. Liked by everyone and is always there for her friends. Strong on the inside. Is more focused on other things than relationships with men, but liked by many of them even though they are usually single. Good arguer and they hate drama. Very stubborn and relentless. Does exactly what they want, and can break hearts. Usually born in the winter or spring. Can make anyone laugh and they are very, very, smart. Does not realize their own beauty, but very beautiful inside and out.
Example
Megans are a one of a kind and many guys would be lucky to have them.
[This one is also quite true.]

Megan (v): The act of jumping from tall buildings with parachute pants and often times an umbrella.
Example
"Man, she just meganed off that roof!"
[This one is my fave I think]

Anyway, have a nice indiscriminate-time-period!!

xoxo,
Megan

Kg's to Goal: 5
Guitar Hero Plays This Year: 34
Mental Slaps Today: 5

*facepalm*

I thought that the 'Special Extra Post' for the day before yesterday had been posted after midnight and so it could count to be my post for yesterday and not special or extra at all. Turns out it was like at 11:30. Doh! The latter half of BEDHAM is turning out well as you can see. Not.

It's my formal tonight so I'm really excited. I'm also quite nervous and I don't really know why. Whoosh, breathe in and out. I'm considering composing a schedule for everything that I need to do today, but I think that might stress me out. It's my senior prom! That always seems like such a big deal in American movies but formals are like soooo not taken as seriously here as they are in America. Then again, Australians like never take anything seriously...except sport.

Just a quick note: I'm actually sixteen and on the eighth of May I'll be turning seventeen. In Australia, you spend the majority of your senior year being seventeen, not eighteen like in America. It would be disastrous! Because the legal drinking age here is eighteen, no one would ever get anything done lol!

My hands are kind of shaking...I think I'm stressing myself out :P It's Labour Day on Monday! I'm really glad it's a long weekend this weekend (it's Saturday today) because I have an assignment due on Tuesday and basically today and tomorrow have been written off so I need some time to do it.

I might also mention that we don't get special allowance for it being 'prom weekend' or anything at my school because the formal isn't associated with the school. Aaaages ago, like twenty or thirty years ago at the last school formal, one fateful guy fatefully puked on some princess-twit's VERY EXPENSIVE dress. She decided to sue the school for negligence. So, we don't have them 'officially' anymore.

But one of the parents in the year always organises it. I think it's better like this actually because like it means that you can take whoever you want. Like, I go to an all-girls Catholic school right? So if you were a lesbian and wanted to take a girl, you wouldn't be allowed to. But since it's not done through the school you can take whoever you want. A lot of girls are actually just taking female friends of theirs because they feel like it, and that's allowed too.

See, my problem is that I didn't have ANYONE to take, being excluded from the male sex for a majority of the year doesn't really lend itself to great friendship opportunities. Luckily, one of my friends' older brother has a group of friends who wanted to come, so I'm taking one of them. We've hung out before so it's not going to be weird or anything hehe. I'm just a bit worried that he doesn't like me :( Oh well, he can deal, it's my formal so he can at least pretend hehe.

I dunno, do you guys in America have pre-formal parties? We do here, it's basically a very dignified event where all of the parents and children of a friendship group go to one person's house so they get to see everyone and take pictures with everyone. It's nice but it also means that your formal getting-ready time is reduced by about an hour and a half.

It was kind of sad actually, I don't know if getting fake tans before formals is big in America but it's HUGE here. Like, seriously, massive. All of the popular girls, and most of the un-popular girls, get it done. I don't because I think it looks horrendous. It very rarely looks good, like hardly EVER. I think most people look best with their natural skin colour, really. I mean, if you saw the pictures that I posted of my dress you'd know that I'm quite pale, but I like that. They nearly always look orange. The most depressing thing about it all was the crash diets that they're all going on! One of them has been only eating lemons for the past week, it's so unhealthy! The worst thing is that they know it's unhealthy but they just don't care.

I think it's strange how most people at the formal aren't going to look like themselves at all. They're all getting their hair dyed, they won't have their normal skin colour, their make-up will be all done...it's weird. I want a very natural sort of look for my make-up and I want a messy bun for my hair. This is the picture that I'm taking to the hairdresser anyway:

Of course, it's going to have to be quite different because I have a fringe (bangs) that will need to be pulled back and I don't want it QUITE so messy, but that's the general feel that I'm after. I also sort of want like two or three smallish braids running back into bun, I think that would look nice. I'm also just doing my make-up myself whereas most people are getting it done. I'm pretty low-key about the whole thing, overall.

Anyway, I think I've bored you enough :P I should probably go and have breakfast and have a shower etc. before my hair app. Wish me luck!

xoxo,

Megan

Kg's to Goal: 5

Guitar Hero Plays This Year: 34

Mental Slaps Today: 2 (but it's very early in the day, remember that :P)